“Heavenly Father, thank you for this day. It was a good day… And thank you, God, for healing my daddy. In your name I pray. Amen.”
Cole prayed this prayer at the supper table Monday night.
As soon as his prayer ended, he burst into tears. With chubby little hands, he covered his eyes and sobbed. We rushed to him and held him, assuring him that indeed God did HEAL his daddy! That Daddy is healthy now and how it is something to be happy about! That he was right to thank and praise God!!
He understood but said it still makes him sad to think about.
(My healthy, 39 year old husband, Stevie-P, suffered a major heart attack on May 1, 2016. If you’re a Facebook friend, you’re well aware of our journey. But if you only follow my blog, this is brand new information. I’ll tell more of the story one day…)
The next day as we drove to get Abbie from school, he asked me, “How did the doctors know Daddy had a heart attack?” and if they had to cut his heart open to fix it.
I explained how they ran tests and took pictures of Daddy’s heart to see it was, indeed, a heart attack. Then, they used one of his veins like a tunnel to get to his heart where they put a tiny “straw” inside for the blood to flow through. He seemed to understand but I could still see the wheels turning.
When I asked why he’s thinking about Daddy’s heart so much lately, he again told me he didn’t want to talk about it anymore because it makes him sad.
Again, me too.
I have no idea where his thoughts are stemming from or what is running through that cute little head of his, but I know my heart breaks every time he asks such things. He’s just 4 years old.
Watching My Love have a heart attack, racing him to the hospital with our babies in tow, was one of the scariest moments of my life– and probably theirs. I wish I could forget about it, too.
I desperately want my children to be protected from such grown-up issues and worries, from stress and fear, especially when they’re off my watch. But this morning as I prayed for Cole’s heart to be cleansed of these fears and his mind renewed of these thoughts, the Lord whispered this…
You spend more time praying for your people’s protection than you do their perfection. Pray, instead, for them to become more like Me.
I do pray 24-7 for my people’s protection from just about everything. From harm, injury, fear, danger, rejection, temptation, sin. It’s what Momma’s do. I so want my people to have safe, happy lives, but if they’re always safe and happy, how will they learn to trust God? How will they become more like Him? How will they learn to seek Him when it’s hard? How will they know He is able to overcome all things; that nothing is beyond Him?
I hate Satan and sin, and I hate the sickness and evil this world is infested with. But my people live here in the thick of it. Despite my attempts, they will be faced with all the things I want to keep from them.
If I’ve learned anything from this season, it’s that I can change Nothing. I cannot change the fact that my children witnessed their daddy’s heart attack. I cannot change the fact their Grandpa moved to Heaven without saying goodbye. I cannot change what their futures hold, but I can guide them to trust The One who holds their future.
I can share the glorious hope we have because of Jesus. I can tell them how He overcame sin and death and rose from the grave, and how one day we will, too. I can show them how to live anchored to that hope, no matter what storm rages around them.
I can’t stop the situations they will face, but I can pray for those situations to draw them closer to Christ. To help them love and trust Him more. To make them look more like Him.
Yes, I can still ask God for their safety, but like Jesus prayed, I must also ask for their sanctity.
“I have given them Your word. And the world hates them because they do not belong to the world, just as I do not belong to the world. I’m not asking You to take them out of the world, but to keep them safe from the evil one. They do not belong to this world any more than I do. Make them holy by Your truth; teach them Your word, which is truth.” ~Jesus
John 17:14-17 (NLT)
“This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls. It leads us through the curtain into God’s inner sanctuary.”
Hebrews 6:19 (NLT)